Sunday, March 31, 2013

all it took was that Walk towards HIM.

It's been a year since I bravely did something I've always wanted to do. That is to join the yearly "Alay Lakad" activity done by Catholics every Holy Week.

Alay Lakad is a way of Sacrifice as part of our Catholic belief where people starts to walk from Quiapo church to Antipolo Cathedral. You can actually start from your own place for example myself, I started from my workplace in Ortigas.

Since nobody wants to accompany me because it is after work, I bravely threaded the stretch of Ortigas Extension Alone. It was a meditating walk I must say. I got to reflect on what my life has been for the past years. I pray for enlightenment as I am about to make the biggest decision in my life. I look back, then I look forward. I don't see anything clear then, but a growing hope is slowly exciting me with something. I have to believe a major blessing is coming my way.

It was not a walk in the park and it was indeed tiring knowing it's a long way to go but all of it were negligible as I took the time observing the group of people around me. I wonder what  their real intentions are in participating in activities like this.
I was alone but I never felt scared because I believe I'm guided.

Half down the road, a stranger approached me. I thank God for times like these because He always send me angels. We talked and walked and waited for their friends. Turns out they are a group of friends who used to do these every year. Now I've got new friends and they led me to the stations of the cross.

Jesus is tried and condemned by the Sanhedrin, mocked and beaten and is condemned for making the claim of being the Son of God

I will never forget how I've felt those goosebumps on my skin while I listen to the recorded voices of the characters who played on this scene. The mocking, the shouting and the cruelness of people to Christ were heart wrenching. But Jesus just let them be. I felt ashamed of myself. There was a point in my life when I was so concerned on my name being dragged into someone else's insecurities. My name was tagged with malicious and false accusations and it hurt me and made me angry. I followed my feelings instead of letting my feelings follow what I am supposed to do. I realized Christ's sufferings are far unimaginable than what I have been through. So on that station I lifted up to Christ my name completely. It made me cry and His warm embrace felt really good. 

The stations of the cross reminds me of my own journey. Though I have surrendered all my pains before year 2012 began, sometimes my faith still get tested. But unlike Jesus, I sometimes still question how people can be so cruel and how they deserve such pitiful life with the choices they make. I'm still carrying new crosses every now and then. But this time I believe Jesus is carrying it for me. I used to think of many things on resolving my problems and all it took was that Walk towards HIM.

What will it take you to follow HIM?